|Ronnie Woo Woo pays his cable bill. (Deadspin)|
Evidently, an address update regarding the resume I forwarded Theo earlier this month about the Red Sox managerial opening is necessary. (Because it is really about Me and Theo...)
However, before I just blast off my resume to Theo at 1060 West Addison in Chicago, Illinois - I thought a few questions should be answered about things on the North side and the Cubs current state of affairs. I would like to know more about this "baseball is better.." theme he had working at his introductory presser.
from Chicago Sun Times:
"To me, baseball is better with tradition, baseball is better with history, baseball is better with fans who care, baseball is better in ballparks like this, baseball is better during the day. And baseball is, best of all, when you win," Epstein said during a packed Wrigley Field news conference.
"I firmly believe that we can preserve the things that make the Cubs so special and over time build a consistent winner, a team that will be playing baseball in October consistently and a team that will ultimately win the World Series."
Let me take the baseball is better theme one by one:
Baseball is better with tradition: A tradition is a belief, customer, information, etc that is passed down generational. This does not bode well for Theo and the lovable loser of a franchise that plays their games at Wrigley Field. Maybe he should have gone with the Hope and Change theme. At least that theme bought a certain Chicago resident four years of job security.
Baseball is better with history: SMH (shaking my head) -did he not check out the last 103 years of history of Chicago Cubs baseball? Hell, didn't he at least check out the most recent year's history? Theo, Theo, Theo.
Baseball is better with fans who care: SMH again - This fan base cares about the wrong thing. This is a fan base that ostracized one of their own -Bartman. Steve Bartman was a Cub fan that actually cared about the outcome of the game instead of how much Old Style he consumed. Heaven forbid Cub fans recall the shortstop that made a critical error moments later, or the Kid wonder that could not hold a lead in game 7 against Florida the next day. Yes, Cub fans care---they care about billy goats and scape goats.
Baseball is better in ballparks like this: ....like this...you mean Wrigley Field? Aside from the lack of success at Wrigley Field, which opened in 1916, there are no luxury boxes, obstructed view seating, maintenance costs of $10 million per year, and communal urinals for the men. Yes, that means the drunk, obnoxious Cub fan from Des Moines is splashing his beer piss all over you. Much better-if you are in to that sorta thing.
Baseball is better during the day: - Ummm, if you are eleven. Free advice - don't sign guys like Josh Hamilton with blue eyes if you believe this.
Baseball is best of all, when you win: Finally, Theo and I agree on something related to his baseball is better theme! I think we can work together on this outlook. Theo can continually sell this, I can get Ron Woo Woo to change his name to Ronnie Win Win, and Chicago will live happily ever after.
Get at me Theo.
Until Next Time,
*Little known CT fact - I once had a dance off with Ronnie Woo Woo during Spring Training in Tempe, Arizona at Gibson's. I'm not going to say who won...I wouldn't want to hurt my chances with Theo before my interview.